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My essay on why FedEx sucks today

*clear throat* *shuffle papers*
Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls...we are going to discuss the fact that FedEx blows a big goat today. I say "today" because I have been informed, by a reliable source, that they are usually a really good company that always gets everything where it is supposed to be when it is supposed to be there. But my friends, today they failed miserably.
Why do they bother to give people the zillion different shipping options they offer, if they really have no intention of making sure that they hold up on their end of the bargain? That is just stupid.

Here is my story.

I ordered a Visor from Handspring. It was supposed to be here by today. How do I know this? Because I checkmarked the little box on the shipping portion of the order that said it would be. Without fail, a confirmation window popped up showing me that a significant dollar amount got tacked on to my bill for the guarantee that I would be totally organized and ready to get on with my high tech housewifery duties by today. I was fine with that.

Today comes and I get a wake up call from an out of breath FedEx employee that sounded like she was standing in the middle of I-75, during rush hour, screaming into a really crappy cell phone. She was requesting that I call FedEx and give them my correct address information, as I didn't quite make it down the stairs fast enough to take her call. So, continuing to do MY part, I called.

A request was sent by the customer service representitive to her for redelivery to the correct address. By the way, the address mistake was made by FedEx, not Handspring. So, I waited for a while longer. Putting all of my important wifely duties (showering and running to the Victorias Secret Semi-Annual Clearance Sale) on hold so that I could continue to do MY part and wait patiently for the delivery. After lunch we called again, with no progress.

I made a call to Handspring to ensure that if I didn't receive it today, I would be refunded my overnight shipping charge. Handspring didn't understand why FedEx wasn't going to just deliver it today. The package was only approximatly fifteen miles from my house. Handspring then called FedEx to request that FedEx definately deliver it today. They insisted FedEx would have to make the shipping refund also. FedEx said they couldn't make sure it got delivered today, but that they would "try".

At that point my husband called FedEx back and insisted that we get the package today or that we would come pick it up ourselves. The latter being a last resort. And shortly before I started typing this I received a call saying that they just weren't going to do it today, but we could come get it ourselves. I guess on a Friday at 2p.m. that was just an unreasonable request to ask them to fix their own mistake. So basically, I paid overnight shipping charges for a package that I have to go pick up myself, on my time, with my own vehicle, with gas that I paid for, with three screaming children in tow! And if that isn't a kick in the face, I am still not sure if they are going to refund my shipping charge. Bastards.

So the lesson we all learned today is...
FedEx lies. If they don't feel like getting it to you on time, they won't. It doesn't matter how much you paid them.
thankyouverymuch

Posted by gwendolyn on December 29, 2000 at 02:55 PM